6 Months into the "Mom" thing

Well it has been quite a few months since my last post. Things in my life have changed in very gigantic ways. As I wrote in my last post, Allen is now living with me. Now for all of you who I have kept in contact with regularly you know all of the ups and downs I have faced. I do have to say that becoming a Mom has really opened my eyes. I have apologized over and over and over to my own Mom for all the horrible things I did to her.  LOL!! She is now enjoying the fact that I am having to deal with all the same issues she had to deal with when I was 10. I guess life has a way of turning us around. I think it has actually made my relationship with my Mom better. She is my rock. She is the one who is helping me keep my head above water. I don't know if I could have taken on this challenge without her. She keeps reminding me that I am strong enough to think things through and be the bigger person. Not to be the selfish person that I have allowed myself to be for the last 29 years. It's amazing what Mom's can do for you.

I don't know what I would do without my Mom in my life. Through all of our ups and downs in our life together she has shown me what a strong woman really is. With all of her trials in life she has walked right through with her head held high. She is what I strive to be. I hope that I am half the person that she has shown us how to be. I know that I can stand on my own two feet just like her. She has taught me how to be a strong, honest, loyal, caring and independant woman. I hope to never let her down. Show her I can be my own woman, just as she was her own.

I know that in the last 6 months life has turned upside down for me. It has offered me challenges that I have never faced before. I am working on dealing with those challenges. It is shown me that I have to find my "inner peace". Find out what I want out of life. It's amazing that at 29 years old I am finally sitting down to think about that. You think I would have been working towards that before. I guess I had to stumble first before I realized what I was missing out on. So I have decided that I will take time out of life for ME. I need ANG time. I need to figure out what is my BLISS. I am on my way to figuring that out. I just want to thank all of you who have helped me along that path. I know sometimes I may have been hard headed and stubborn, but that was just me dragging my feet. I am starting to pick them up and walk this path. See what is ahead with open eyes instead of pulling away with eyes that are tightly squeezed shut.

So with one step at a time I move forward in this new life. Motherhood, Happiness and Bliss. Learning that I can't control every little thing and that I have to just let life happen. Wish me luck!!